Do folks in other countries want extensive coverage of the funeral?  Heck, some Democrats in the USA think it’s an end run for the Republicans to avoid the equal time rule and get an extended plug for their side.

Folks in London know that the supporters of the Tottenham Hotspurs are cultured, refined gentlemen and that it is the Manchester U fans that besmirch all the enthusiasts with the “soccer hooligan” label.  Americans might not know about such subtleties, because soccer is not “their bag.”  Well, turnabout is fair play.  Why would the folks in Perth care about a World Series baseball competition where the possibility that the local Freemantle Dockers (an Australian Football team) might make the cut, is as realistic a hope as they can muster for a local team.

Do American news organizations watch foreign media looking for items to bring to their English speaking audience?  If not why not?  Is it part of an arrogant cultural imperialism or is the more tawdry explanation that in the age of cost cutting, when accounting departments rule supreme.  The bean counters don’t want to spend one frivolous franc (let alone a farthing) to get a good story.  How do you find non-American media?  One way is to start at the black stump and go from there.

If you must have a mention of the last week’s news from the land of the gringos, our favorite anecdote was found in Al Franken’s book Rush Limbaugh Is A Big Fat Idiot (page 143 of the Island Books paperback edition): “Reagan is standing with several of the seniors, who have been invited to pose for pictures with him.  He chats up each of the graduates, and to one of the boys says:  ‘My name is Ronald Reagan.  What’s yours?’  The boy says:  ‘I’m your son Mike.’”  The incident occurred in 1964, long before the onset of the Alzheimer’s disease, so maybe it’s just an example of the Republican application of their family value philosophy that they revere so highly.

Have you seen anything about a story from South America about a fellow who claims to be an 18^th Century Frenchman and the first bona fide time traveler?  We saw a story about that but the ever parsimonious head of the JAS accounting department (AKA Mistress de Sade) would only laugh cruelly if we requested the funds to purchase the publication where we found the item.  It doesn’t matter if it is true or an elaborate hoax, either way it’s a top-notch human interest story.  If it’s true historians will have a treasure throve of material to ask about; if it is a well constructed hoax then psychologists will be scratching their heads for years to come.

Google searches by one of the fact finders reveals that maybe my French language abilities aren’t quite as good as I thought they were.  Or maybe English-speaking media just don’t care?

Our Spanish isn’t what it should be, but we monitor some shows here in LA to see if we can find something for our social conversations, if not our columns.  We recently saw a feature on an orchestra that uses organic instruments to produce classical music.  They make flutes by carving out carrots and so on.  They use things like coconut shells for percussion instruments.  If an American CD company releases an album of their work, then the flacks may magically command some English language coverage to appear, but odds are (unless they read JAS) you won’t see about that in any other American based media. 

[ Editor’s note: The First Viennese Vegetable Orchestra was indeed reviewed in these pages here - October 12, 2003 in the column on the right of the page. ]

When was the last time a foreign recording was on the Pop Music charts in the USA?

Kyu Sakamoto had a 1963 hit with Sukiyaki (which isn’t in the original lyrics), and Dominico Modugno had a 1958 hit with Volare (do they use it on the Sopranos)?  Ivo Robic had a 1959 hit with a German song titled Morgen.  Was Dominique done in 1963 by the singing nun, the last foreign language hit in the USA?  Does The Macarena Song count?

Chris Harris has been quoted (page 26 of Jon Winokur’s The Traveling Curmudgeon) as saying:  “Frankfurt is a large, unfriendly financial center filled with dirty, gray office high-rises, thus earning it the title “the most Americanized city in Europe.”

Now, if the disk jockey will play one of my favorite German songs, Claudia Jung will sing Je T’Aime Mon Amour – yeah, I know, the song is in German and the title refrain is in French, it’s too complicated to explain it, right here, right now – we’ll take a French leave, caio for now.

Text and Photograph Copyright © 2004 – Robert Patterson

We asked veteran journalist Bob Patterson for a bio and he sent this along:  

Bob was born and raised in Scranton, Pennsylvania.

 

Graduated from the University of Scranton in . . . make that "way back when."

 

He has worked as a reporter and photographer for daily newspapers in California, Nevada, and Pennsylvania.  During the "way back when" phase of his life.

 

Did photo stringing for the AP’s Los Angeles bureau in the seventies.

 

Has done some freelance work.

 

Held other jobs to pay the rent and provide meals money.

 

Has written book and movie reviews, and columns for Delusions of Adequacy online magazine for the last four years.

 

Recently the DOA management reportedly traded him to the Just Above Sunset online magazine team for an undisclosed sum and two future draft choices.

 

He is known to be in the LA area and is considered dangerous.  If you see him, call for backup before attempting to get his autograph or some such fanboy nonsense.